Everything (Bagel) Everywhere All At Once
Recently I watched the film “Everything Everywhere All At Once” and I loved it. It’s so original, so beautiful, and I wanted to do a craft inspired by this movie, so I made a recipe based on the “black hole bagel” from the film. I started with this recipe from Sophisticated Gourmet and added molasses and black cocoa powder, which are ingredients often used to give pumpernickel bread its dark color. While these bagels come out brown instead of black, they were quite delicious! I have no regrets. See the recipe below, and do see the movie if you haven’t yet!
Everything (Bagel) Everywhere All at Once
Dough Ingredients
2 tsp active dry yeast
4.5 tsp molasses
1.25 cups warm water (divided)
3.5 cups bread flour + up to 1/2 cup for kneading
1 tbsp black cocoa
1.5 tsp salt
Goth Everything Seasoning
1.5 tbsp poppy seeds
3 tbsp black sesame seeds
1 tbsp dried black garlic flakes
1 tbsp black salt flakes (e.g. volcanic salt)
Mix the molasses into half a cup of warm water (105˚F to 110˚F). Next, add two teaspoons of dry active yeast, stirring a little bit just to make sure all the yeast is in the water.
While the yeast is activating, mix a tablespoon of black cocoa powder and 3.5 cups of bread flour. (I promise the cocoa powder won’t make the bagels taste like chocolate, like the molasses, it’s just there to help darken the dough.) Next, add 1.5 teaspoons of salt around the outside of the flour so that it doesn’t immediately kill the yeast when you add it to the center of the bowl.
After a few minutes, your yeast mixture should be foamy. Give it another stir to make sure the yeast is dissolved and pour it into the center of your flour mixture. You can start the stand mixer at this point and add an additional 1/3 cup of water. If you are mixing by hand, add the 1/3 cup of water before mixing. After you’ve mixed it a bit, add the rest of the water (just under a 1/2 cup or 100 milliliters). Mix this until everything forms into one ball of dough. If your dough is too dry, you can add a little more liquid; if it is too wet, you can add a little more flour.
Knead the dough until it is smooth and elastic, about 10 to 15 minutes. Let the dough rise in a covered greased bowl for at least an hour or until doubled in size.
While you wait, you can make the everything bagel spice blend. Toss the spices with a spoon until they are thoroughly mixed.
After an hour, punch down the dough, cover it again, and let it rest for 10 minutes. Then, divide the dough into 8 equal pieces, shaping each into a ball, and then making a hole in center to stretch the dough into a bagel shape. The bagels will puff out, so keep that in mind as you craft your ideal shape. Arrange the bagels on a parchment lined sheet pan, cover with a damp towel, and let them rest for another 10 minutes.
During this time, bring a pot of water to a boil and preheat your oven to 425 degrees Fahrenheit.
After the bagels have rested, turn the pot of water down to a gentle simmer and add a few bagels, keeping the good side (the prettier side is usually the top) face down in the water. After a minute, flip them over and simmer for an additional minute. Retrieve your bagels with a slotted spoon or spatula and place them back on your parchment lined sheet pan. Repeat this process for all bagels. To try to get my dough even darker, I mixed powdered black food dye with a wash of egg whites and water to paint my bagels with.* This will also help my spice mix to stick to the bagels. After the bagels are coated and spiced, bake them for 20 to 25 minutes.
Let cool on a rack and enjoy.
*This is what I attempted with mine, but something that might work better is to mix the powdered dye with vodka and then paint onto your dough. I’ll try this next time!
